HD49933 Be Good: Woot Weads The Wire

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Every week in this space, weâ??ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: thatâ??s Woot Weads the Wire.

ROME (UPI) -- Mushroom hunting season in Italy is proving fatal for some, with 18 dead, mostly in accidental falls, in 10 days, officials said.

Mushroom hunters are urged to remember not to attempt to jump towards the spinning fire wall until they are sure they won't land in the lava.

LIVERPOOL, England (UPI) -- A toilet reportedly used by former Beatle John Lennon sold for $18,341 to an unnamed bidder at a Beatles convention held in Liverpool, organizers say.

A toilet from Paul McCartney is still available under the name "Wings: Back To The Egg".

KERNERSVILLE, N.C. (UPI) -- A North Carolina collector is auctioning "The Catcher in the Rye" author J.D. Salinger's toilet on eBay with an asking price of $1 million.

Authorities are offering to take the guy who bought John Lennon's toilet into protective custody at any time.

ARLINGTON, Va. (UPI) -- In the United States, where many people can't speak English properly, a Washington acting troupe says it will perform Shakespeare in Klingon.

In a related story, somebody's quite the grumpy bear over at the UPI.

BOULDER, Colo. (UPI) -- A distant star U.S. scientists say is "ringing like a bell" could provide clues to other stars that might have planets that might be able to host life.

Scientists added that the star may not have learned to read or write so well, but they still encouraged it to go again and again.

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Crude oil prices settled slightly during the Monday, dropping under $75 per barrel after a modest recovery last week.

Classy oil prices said they never discussed such affairs in public.

 



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