You'd Think It Would Have Been Used In The 90s: Woot Weads The Wire

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Every week in this space, weâ??ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: thatâ??s Woot Weads the Wire.

SEATTLE (UPI) -- D.B. Cooper, who parachuted from a hijacked plane over Washington state 40 years ago Thursday, may have worked with titanium, a scientific team says.

Reportedly FBI agents moved in on Titanium this morning, only to find it barricaded behind the Alkaline Earth metals with Scandium and Yttrium as hostages.

LONDON (UPI) -- Prince Philip officially became the honorary commander of the British Navy Wednesday, receiving the title of Lord High Admiral.

Surprisingly enough, the title has not already been trademarked by a marijuana-themed rapper.

LONDON (UPI) -- British filmmaker Ken Russell has died, his friend Norman Lebrecht confirmed Monday. He was 84.

The funeral is anticipated to be interesting, visually arresting, and about thirty minutes shorter upon U.S. release.

LONDON (UPI) -- A London bar has installed a video game above its men's room urinals that the game's designer says is the world's first to be controlled by urine flow.

Those in the know say the platform will include Guitar Hero: Chuck Berry, the highly anticipated Nick Novak's Pro Football Challenge, an English-language version of Gerard Depardieu's Flight Simulator, and a port of Nethack with music from R. Kelly.

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- Los Angeles said it plans to create 50 new city parks with some of the space coming from at least 10 foreclosed properties.

Those on whom the city foreclosed will not be allowed to sleep in the parks.



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